The Cynical Cinephiles

Director: Alex Kurtzman Starring: Tom Cruise, Annabelle Wallis, Jake Johnson, Russell Crowe, Sofia Boutella The decision to reinvent an –admittedly not highly celebrated – but nonetheless popular movie franchise is oftentimes understandably unwelcome. We anticipated a worthy reason when it was decided to reboot the Brendan Fraser starring movies, themselves a loose remake of the 1932 horror film of the same name, we could only hope it would bring an innovative new spin on the film’s subject, or perhaps an exploration into a previously untouched subplot, or hell, just a better godamn version. Alas, Alex Kurtzman’s The Mummy is none of these things. Alex Kurtzman’s The Mummy is lousy. The plot follows audacious soldier Nick Morton (Cruise) who seeks out ancient relics and sells them for a cash reward. Joined by partner Chris Vail (Johnson) they stumble upon the tomb of an Egyptian princess (Boutella). Archaeologist Jennifer Halsey (Wallis), embittered following a sour romant...

Director: Roger Michell Cast: Rachel Weisz, Sam Claflin, Holliday Grainger, Iain Glen Adapted from Daphne du Maurier's 1957 novel of the same name, My Cousin Rachel  is a mystery romance laced with intrigue but Michell's iteration of the classic text injects a healthy (or potentially lethal) dose of gothic sensibility. After trailing to Italy, young Englishman Philip (Sam Claflin) discovers that his dear cousin Ambrose has died. He swears revenge on Ambrose's widow Rachel (Rachel Weisz), blaming her for his cousin's demise. However, when Philip meets Rachel, he is quickly entranced by her and he is soon hopelessly in love - but is Rachel harbouring deceit? The success of My Cousin Rachel largely depends upon the effectiveness of the portrayal of the eponymous character and Weisz's performance is utterly compelling and carefully controlled. She is charming and wonderfully charismatic who enchants everyone she encounters. But for a woman of her time, she's ...

Director: Patty Jenkins Cast: Gal Gadot, Chris Pine, Robin Wright, David Thewlis, Danny Huston, Connie Nielsen She's an icon. Everyone knows her moniker. But it's taken 76 years for Wonder Woman to make her solo debut on the silver screen. In that time, both Batman and Superman have undergone eight different portrayals on film and television each and now finally , the third point in the DC trinity is getting her turn. Princess Diana (Gal Gadot), who grows up on the Amazon island of Themyscira, is a compassionate but fearsome warrior who has been sheltered by her mother Queen Hippolyta (Connie Nielsen) her whole life. However, when American pilot and spy Steve Trevor (Chris Pine) crashes offshore the island and has to be saved by Diana, he informs her of World War 1 and she desires to leave her home and end the war to save mankind. Gadot's Wonder Woman was most certainly the highlight of 2016's Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice , a film that was overwhelmed by it...

Director: James Gunn Cast: Chris Pratt, Zoe Saldana, Dave Bautista, Vin Diesel, Bradley Cooper, Michael Rooker, Karen Gillan, Pom Klementieff, Kurt Russell The time has arrived, a-holes! The Guardians of the Galaxy are back, and this time, they're bolder, brighter and more ballsy than ever before. Once considered Marvel's greatest risk, James Gunn and his creation have certainly earned their stripes, both in terms of box office success and critical/fan praise - but can the highly anticipated sequel sustain the acclaim? Peter Quill (Chris Pratt) and co have firmly established themselves as the Guardians of the Galaxy and are hired by a powerful and regal alien race, the Sovereign, to protect their batteries from foulsome creatures However, the Sovereign discover that Rocket (voiced by Bradley Cooper) has stolen their precious cargo and send their forces to pursue and take vengeance on the space rogues. As the Guardians scarper for their lives, they soon discover the identit...

April Fool’s Day, perhaps the most significant date in the Christian calendar, celebrating the time when Jesus notoriously pranked Judas by slapping him in the balls in front of the other disciples. Sure, we’ve all been subjected to a humble wind-up, but no one can dupe and humiliate like our friends in the movies. Here’s a list of the best practical jokers, appearing in everything from teen thrillers to thought-provoking dramas about race inequality. No genre is above a whimsical jape! Amelie Poulain – Amelie Don’t let the pixie cut and chocolat eyes fool you, Amelie is a mischievous minx. Whether she’s tampering with timepieces, or tinkering with toothpaste, she’s the unidentified scourge of trickery to the neighbours. Her magnum opus of misconduct comes when, as a child, she interferes with the TV aerial of a neighbour during a big televised football game. S acré bleu! Kevin McCallister – Home Alone Kevin McCallister puts his pranking abilities to practical...

Director: Jordan Vogt-Roberts Cast: Tom Hiddleston, Samuel L. Jackson, John Goodman, Brie Larson, John C. Reilly, Toby Kebbell, Corey Hawkins Shared universes are all the rage in Hollywood nowadays; Disney's Marvel have fathomed a superhero heavy world where characters such as Iron Man and Captain America throw down one another. Warner Brothers' DC possesses a similar world with their roster of superheroes including Batman, Wonder Woman and Harley Quinn, but the studio now adds another shared universe to their collection - monsters . 2014's Godzilla  kicked things off and 2017 sees the arrival of the legendary King Kong, with the plan to eventually unite the iconic monsters. But is this new iteration of the almighty ape worth beating your chest about? AN uncharted island in the Pacific Ocean tickles the curiosity of a group of soldiers, scientists and adventurers, but what they find is bigger and badder than anything they've been trained for. Confronted by Kong a...

Director: James Mangold Cast: Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart, Boyd Holbrook, Stephen Merchant, Richard E. Grant, Dafne Keen It's time to say farewell. After a tumultuous but wonderful seventeen years, Hugh Jackman has bid adieu to the franchise that made him famous. Yes, Jackman has feverishly stated time and time again that Logan will be his last outing as the adamanteum-coated mutant before he hangs up the claws for good. With the trailers promising a darker tone and the shedding of more blood and tears,  this depiction of Wolverine is unlike any audiences have seen before. The year is 2029, and mutants are near extinction, with no new mutants born in 25 years. A weary James "Logan" Howlett (Hugh Jackman), whose self-healing powers have considerably waned, cares for his former mentor, an ailing Professor X (Patrick Stewart). Their goal to search for peace and safety is scuppered when they're confronted by Laura (Dafne Keen), a young mutant with powers identical ...